Resident Evil Remaster Review: Really Righteous Remake


Forgive me if this comes out as less of a game review and more of a love letter but I don’t think there is a game I’ve played through more times and on more consoles than the updated remake of the original Resident Evil. Seriously, if I have one regret, it’s that I’m never going to recapture that wonderful, wait, magical moment back in 2002 when a young, starry eyed, slightly huskier version of myself entered that gorgeously rendered mansion foyer… and then attempted to leave through the front door because he realized that the scariest game he had played up until that point was Luigi’s Mansion and that there wasn’t going to be Boos wandering around this place.

I envy that kid. And that’s saying something, because he smelled. Terribly.

Seriously, the Crimson Head in this room still gives me a little heart attack every time I go to grab the Armor Key.

Scariest. Hallway. Ever.

Listen, there are not enough words in the English language to properly describe my love for this game. I can write pages and pages of how the tone and atmosphere is pitch perfect, how the game rewards careful item management, how it punishes you for carelessness. The cinematic camera angles, the enemies, the rooms you have to skip because “HOLY CRAP, I didn’t burn those zombies, and how long does it take before they grow claws, start running and turn blood red? AGGGGHH, they’re coming through doors now!” No, this game is over 12 years old now. I’m pretty sure that’s been done to death by better writers than I so with that said, I’ll stick to brass tax and just give you the basics.

Resident Evil is a survival horror game in which your protagonist, either Chris Redfield or Jill Valentine, is stuck inside a mansion filled with zombies and deadly biological experiments that you must deal with while at the same time searching the house, solving puzzles and uncovering a crazy conspiracy. While the puzzles and enemy encounters are the same, based on who you choose (Chris or Jill), your experience will be different. Jill is great for beginners, you get a couple more inventory boxes (way better than it sounds), a lockpick, a Grenade Launcher, and best of all, Barry, who is a lifesaver. Chris has a much more challenging scenario. He carries a lighter, and gets to use a flamethrower, that’s more or less it. Rebecca isn’t going to be pulling you out of the fire like Barry does, but Chris can take much more hits than Jill so there is that.

In this new release for PS4/Xbox One/PS3/Xbox 360/PC, the already amazingly detailed graphics have gotten a nice update and the famously odd tank controls are no longer your primary way to move around. In addition to that, Capcom has added leaderboards, extra costumes for the player, and the game all around moves at a smooth framerate.

All of these are nice but really, they only thing they could have added was “works on my PS4” and I would have been more than happy. This game is a masterpiece, if you’ve played it before and loved it like I have, come back, it’s still amazing. If by some horrible circumstance you haven’t played it, do yourself a favor and rectify that. Hopefully you can capture that fat, easily scared 13 year old inside yourself too.