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The Ten Commandments of Online Multiplayer
With the ever-increasing presence of multiplayer in today’s industry, its more than likely you’ve played an online match in your lifetime as a gamer.
Multiplayer can be fun; it’s a pretty uniquely satisfying take on competition, and if implemented right, can even be a major selling point for the game itself, like we see with Call of Duty or Halo.
But from MMOs to FPSs, we’ve all encountered at least one of the sins committed by gamers in online matches. Just to clear the air and make things more enjoyable, here’s a list of the Ten Commandments for online gamers to live by and help us all enjoy multiplayer even more.
1) Thou shalt not blame others for your mistakes.
If you make a decision to mess with guys you probably shouldn’t, don’t turn around and point a finger at the low-level noob in your group. Man up and accept the blame, sir. Or madam.
2) Thou shalt not rage quit when you’re about to lose.
Remember when you went to the grocery store that one time, and saw a screaming kid getting half-dragged by his mom down an aisle as he threw a fit over not getting a box of Lucky Charms? That’s pretty much the equivalent of rage quitting when you’re about to lose; it’s awkward, it’s annoying, and your friends will have the same vacant, how-did-I-get-here look that kid’s mom had.
3) Thou shalt not talk smack.
It’s pretty embarrassing to tell people the ways you’re going to mess them up, only to get annihilated by the one quiet dude in the match who practically plays online full time. However, it’s also extremely satisfying when you’re the one on the other end of the spectrum, quieting the smack-talkers. So, I guess this is more of an at-your-own-risk instance than a commandment. You have been warned, though…nothing puts a bigger target on your head.
4) Thou shalt not use your microphone for evil.
Do not sing Ke$ha into the mic during an online match. It’s only funny to you and the other people in your room. Don’t tell your mom you’ll be down to take out the garbage in a minute; don’t breathe into the mic like a killer on a phone in a horror movie…basically, just use it for its intended purpose; casual chat and strategy with teammates.
5) Thou shalt not spew bigotry at other players.
This one is a bit more serious…let’s move past the racial/sexist slurs. It’s immature, it’s insensitive, and it hurts people more than we can ever really know. Multiplayer matches should be a fun, lighthearted competition environment, not hostile.
6) Thou shalt not exploit glitches.
Whether it’s finding a place on the map you can walk onto and pick people off or figuring out ways to blow up and get instant kills, nothing is more annoying than the use of glitches to get kills. If you can’t do it with your own skill, don’t resort to cheating.
7) Thou shalt not attack teammates with friendly fire.
The enemy is the OTHER guys. Duh. Deliberate friendly fire is annoying, and you run the risk of getting your ass kicked if you’re not careful.
8 ) Thou shalt not harass people outside of matches.
Don’t go and send them nasty messages if people rightfully bested you in a match. Just own up and get better. And even if they cheated or were horrible, that’s what reporting is for. Take the high road, don’t resort to flooding someone’s inbox with a load of garbage.
9) Thou shalt have a good internet connection when hosting a match.
Please, please, please. Nobody likes lag; it’s the equivalent to a dog chasing its tail. You move forward, then get sent back when lag kicks in. Just make sure the connection’s smooth so there’s no interruption to the match.
10) Thou shalt turn down your television during a match.
This is almost on par with using your mic for evil, but I think people don’t intentionally do this. Even if you’re not aware, however, if your TV is blaring and your mic is near it, I get to hear the match twice, and things start to get confusing. Just turn it down…or don’t sit so close to the TV.