A recent listing points to a re-release of one of our favorite Grand Theft Autos: San Andreas.
My Dream Call of Duty Loadout
I’ve never been huge on Call of Duty multiplayer. I’m not great at it, and in the past, I’ve usually been more apt to watch people play than jump in myself.
But after reviewing Black Ops II, I’ve been finding myself logging on for matches a lot more than I would have originally, hooking up with friends and playing Kill Confirmed and Team Deathmatch whenever I have a spare few minutes to kill. And while I’m still not great, it’s been a fairly satisfying experience. But there are times when I’m playing that I can’t help but feel like I’d love to have some of the better weapons found in other games at my disposal. Will I ever be able to play with a Hammer of Dawn in Nuketown? It’s probably more likely that the world will end today. But as they say, it’s still fun to dream. And so, here’s my dream Call of Duty loadout.
Guns, guns, guns. It’s the peanut butter to Call of Duty’s jelly. And while I like all the add-ons and customization options you have in COD, there are still a few weapons from other games I’d love nothing more than to equip:
Gravity Gun (Half Life 2)
There’s no weapon quite like the Gravity Gun from Half Life 2, and it could serve as invaluable on the battlefield. Pick up items, launch them at enemies, remove doors and obstacles to open up new areas of the map, and large objects could be blasted out of the way and used as a weapon or cover from enemies. While it’s a slower weapon to use than many of the guns in a standard COD match, it has the potential to be a tactician’s tool for destruction. And I wouldn’t complain if it allowed me to pick up enemies and launch them, either.
Needler (Halo series)
Sure, the Needler is a tricky weapon to use, but it’s still fun nonetheless. Its explosion delay would make for a pretty tense situation against a faster gun, but could also allow for some last-minute kills when things get tense. And in a game that tends to take itself seriously, a Needler would be a fairly goofy addition I’m all too in favor of adding.
Hammer of Dawn (Gears of War)
One of the most satisfying and powerful weapons in the GOW universe, the Hammer of Dawn would be a seriously heavy duty weapon that could dole out a fair amount of damage. Again, it’s a slower weapon, but when used correctly, it’d be devastating. For those who aren’t so hot on precision or quick scoping, just take out the Hammer of Dawn and obliterate any sneaky campers. Problem solved.
Fat Boy (Fallout 3)
What case is there to be made about the Fat Boy? It’s a MINI NUKE. That team of sneaky dudes who like to link up and roam the map together? Gone in one shot. There is, of course, that problem of being disintegrated along with them, but mind your distance and you should be fine.
Golden Gun (Golden Eye 007)
The most genius of secondary weapons, the Golden Gun is a solid gold pistol that promises consistent one-shot kills. It’s a much better option than the standard pea shooters they give you for secondaries, anyway.
Portal Device (Portal)
Think about it…make a Portal behind an enemy, make one below you, fall through behind them and catch them unawares with a knife in their back. Priceless. Of course, you’ll have to figure out the whole takes-time-to-plan-and-aim thing on your own.
Tediore Shotgun (Borderlands 2)
This entry is nice, because not only do you not have to worry about reloading, you also don’t have to think about equipping grenades. Once you’ve emptied all the gun’s ammo, Tediore firearms become a grenade you throw out before they magically re-appear fully loaded in your hands. Yes, and yes.
Plasma Grenades (Halo)
Who doesn’t love these? They kind of burst all over the place instead of explode, and they’re definitely more interesting than those boring ol’ human grenades Chief uses whenever fighting the Covenant. While COD is happy to arm you with concussion grenades and regular explosives in the beginning, I’d love to add these to my loadout after leveling up a few times.
MIRV Corrosive Grenades (Borderlands 2)
Once I got a hold of this grenade mod in Borderlands 2, I never used anything else. If you’re not familiar with them, MIRV grenades explode once, then throw several “baby” grenades out within its vicinity to trigger a second explosion. On mine, I modified the grenade to have corrosive acid in it instead of a standard explosion, spewing a cloud of the nasty green stuff all over enemies and covering a lot more ground than a standard grenade would. They’re used just as frequently as any of my guns in Borderlands 2, and I’d love to bring them over to my Call of Duty multiplayer sessions.
You can arm combat axes in COD, so why not allow me some additional weapons I can use instead of the combat knife?
Guitar (Left 4 Dead 2)
It’s a rockin’ instrument-turned-weapon good enough to slaughter hordes of the undead, so it’s definitely good enough for me to use in a heated match of Free-For-All.
This proximity mine fires a series of sharp metal shrapnel once enemies step near it. It’s a relatively silent instant kill, and could be easily hidden as a sneaky way to take someone out. It seems like a no brainer, I think.
Tomahawk (Assassin’s Creed III)
The game wasn’t great, but Connor’s Tomahawk was sure fun to use in the combat of Assassin’s Creed III. I’d take it over the knife any day. And if the game allowed for stealth takedowns with a Tomahawk? Awesome.
Of course, it wouldn’t be a Call of Duty loadout without perks. And while I like not being seen by enemy planes or running without getting tired, there are a few more distinct powers I’d love to have in the game as well:
Dark Vision (Dishonored)
Dark Vision allows you to see where enemies are located through the surrounding walls and structures in your area. I don’t think I need to explain why this would be extremely helpful.
Phaselock (Borderlands 2)
Maya’s Phaselock ability allows her to suspend an enemy in midair and keep them in limbo while she fires a weapon at their defenseless selves. There are a lot of modifications that can be added to this ability as well, making it an invaluable perk to have in combat.
Bullet Time (Max Payne)
The ability to slow down time and fire at all of your enemies without risk of being killed yourself? Yes, please.
There are many different takes on Invisibility in video games, but I’d love nothing more than to be able to enjoy being completely invisible for a few seconds at a time while moving through maps. It would be especially handy when going through buildings and sneaking up on snipers.
What would you put in your dream Call of Duty loadout? Tell me in the comments below!